Is it a man’s world ?

They say it is a man’s world. I disagree. Since childhood men are discriminated against and made to believe that in order to remain happy in this world they have to please the women around, be it their mother, sister, cousins, wives or girlfriends. All histrionics are women  centric and driven by their moods.

If a woman breaks away from a relationship, she is considered liberated and her action is deemed heroic and hailed by one and all, but the same thing done by a man draws only flak. A man does not even get the consideration that he too might be suffering in the relationship and needed a breakthrough, a benefit of doubt women enjoy ubiquitously and as a de  facto privilege. As far as the woman wants to carry on in the relationship, the man is expected to compromise and make the relation work and when she does not want to do the same, allegations are transferred to the man who has to take the blame of the failed relationship and compensate for the same as well and they call it a man’s world.

If a man breaks away from the relationship, the woman is considered a deserted victim and if a woman deserts a man then also the woman is considered as the liberated victim. If a man continues in an abusive relationship he is called an emotional fool and if a woman continues her commitment is lauded and they call it a man’s world.

If a woman looks for a rich and wealthy man she is considered ambitious and concerned for her future. If a man looks out for a wealthy wife, he is termed greedy. If a man shows slyness towards getting married, he is non  social, non  committal and loose  focused in life, but if a woman does the same she is thinking about her life and career. If a woman passes some lewd comments to a man, she is sportive and courageous, but the same thing done by a man becomes a crime attracting strict penalties and they call it a man’s world.

In the olden days girls were shy to speak of their own feelings and it was considered bad to approach women for relationships and we had laws formulated to protect women and it was called the era of women protection. Slowly women became more outspoken and expressed their feelings more vocally and when they felt like ending relationships and started misusing the same laws meant to protect them, we have now what we are witnessing as Women Empowerment. So where do we see a man’s voice or a say in this?

Earlier when men used to initiate divorces, DIVORCE was considered a bad word and a social taboo. Women were provided protection in the form of alimony and maintenance. Seeing it as an easy route to tax  free money, women started initiating divorces leveling false allegations and DIVORCE is no longer considered a bad word!!! If a man is not willing to divorce his wife, he is said to have caused mental torture to the wife by denying divorce, but if a woman refuses to divorce her husband, she is said to have made attempts to save the marriage and they call it a man’s world.

If a married woman dies, the whole family of the husband is put behind bars and denied bail. They are marked off as criminals and booked under IPC Section 304 B (Dowry Death). If a married man dies, the woman is hailed as the victim and gets everyone’s sympathy. Why is the consideration not given to the possibility of the involvement of his wife in his death, when her death is viewed with an assumption of dowry related torture? Even if there are evidences in favor of the man accused, the same are ignored and he is tried for baseless trial and they call it a man’s world.

Men do the most risky jobs in the society, pay 82 % of taxes in India and yet neither do they have a National Commission of Men to redress their grievances nor a Welfare Ministry to look after them. Even we have animal welfare ministries but not one for men. Men are discriminated against in paying taxes as well, for women have additional tax concessions. Every year 1200 crore Rupees and this year 7200 crore Rupees have been allocated to the women ministry. Of this 82 % is paid by men and the same money is used to frame heavily lopsided laws to frame the same men and defame them and abuse them financially and they call it a man’s world.

Even the media is highly sensitized to women’s issues. A complaint of dowry harassment is lodged and the next day, leading dailies carry the news and print it as if the reporters were staying with the couple and put allegations on the man and his family. But for a man’s case either no coverage is given, or some justification is provided to compensate the wrong  doing happening to the man and they call it a man’s world.

Men are mass brainwashed with this euphoria that it a man’s world and so men need to protect women and in this process all that a man does is viewed with suspicion. It is high time we give a second thought to the thought,

Is it really a man’s world ?
And
How difficult is it to be a man ?

By:Virag.V

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