wife 498a

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    • #681

      Dear sir or madam,

      I am living and working in United Kingdom, i got married last year in Feb 2012 in India. After 10 days or so after marriage i had to come back to work in UK, Because we didn’t had time, we couldn’t get the marriage certificate from Rajasthan. So i could not get the visa for her.I told her i will be coming back after 3 months and do all formalities of visa.

      In June she came with her parents and took all the clothes and gold and left. Because she thought i am not trying to bring her to UK.

      If i had that intension why would i go and do the court marriage in Mumbai,even we were married in Rajasthan. Her main aim was to come to UK, I came to know this only, when i told her that after staying her from last so many years in UK, i am really feeling bored and wants to come back to India. After this only she started behaving differently. Before that she use to talk nicely. But after i came here every day she use to ask me come back and do the paperwork and take me to UK. She started torturing me on phone, started arguing for no reason. She use to tell me she didn’t liked Mumbai. But she still got married to me because i live in UK. But i had told her before that i will be coming back to India. I really didn’t know her intension.

      She was never asked to work at home, she use to wake around at 10am and do her own stuff. My mother use to wash her clothed, literally she never did work at home, but we never mind. But she use to say me on the phone that your mom is not doing anything and she does all the stuff, I knew that she is lying. On this i told her if you want you can stay at your parents place for 15 days and 15 days at my place. On this she use to say NO. I told her why don’t you join any work in Mumbai and start working, so that you will do not need to work at home. But still she didn’t want to work in Mumbai, because she didn’t like Mumbai. I knew she is trying to give me reason and build difference between me and my family. I know my mother she use to wake up early, and today as well she does everything. I can afford maid, but she don’t need.

      My wife use to work in Bangalore, she left the job. I even gave her the option to go to Bangalore and resume the work for few months, till i come back in July. But she doesn’t even want to go to Bangalore. Now how many options should i give? But she was not ready to do anything. She started shouting and getting angry, arguing with me for small things. I felt she has only got married to me because she wanted to come to UK.

      But she got so restless to come to India that she even tried to get the certificate on her own through her uncle, who is lawyer. She told me that her uncle has called her and told her that he can do anything. when i told her it is impossible she told me that her uncle can do this, it is easy for him as he is lawyer, he has done this so many times in past. I don’t like people who do corruption and illegal things. she use to tell me at while travelling by train she never use to buy ticket and just go and sit in reservation and pay the penalty to TC and some more money and get the reservation. I really hated all this, i told her so many times, but she never use to listen to me.

      I stopped calling her for few days, i thought she is still immature, slowly everything will be all right, But I was wrong. She came to my house with her parents, and took all the clothes and Gold along with her to her parents place in Surat. The gold which was given by US. (Even there is story behind gold). The gold was demanded after all the preparations were made her father called my dad and told that ‘‘agar beti laani hain to sona bhi lana padega”.

      We even went to Jewellers and got ornaments for her. We even got that on credit beyond our limits. Cause this was first marriage in our house, as i am elder and my parents didn’t had that much experience, they were very excited about my marriage, and I came to knew this after she left. Because they didn’t told me about this, if i would have knew this before i would have not married to her. Because i am against dowry taking and giving. Bu this is like girls parents are asking for dowry. SO many things were done during our marriage. And after marriage.

      while living I asked her to show everything whatever she is taking to my parents, because i have heard so many cases, that girls run away and then blame puts the blame that the it got stolen by boys family. I just didn’t want my parents to get into trouble.

      My parents and my friends family even went to platform to ask what has happened and why i she going like this? On this she said that go away, otherwise i will shout and gather people. Her father told my dad that” Yeh to ek bahu aayi hai, agar bahu chaiyeh to aana, warna aisi haalat karengey ki piche do ladke aur hain unki bhi shaadi karni hai. On hearing this my dad got angry and told her father that even if my all kids will remain unmarried no problem, but we do not want this type of daughter in law. She was abusing my dad on platform .She also told her that ”buddey tere paav toh kabar mein latak rahe hai aur aisi baat kar raha hai”.

      I don’t know which type of girl which use this type of language against her elders,

      This was not this time, she almost went three times to her parents place, filling bags just going for few days, and coming with empty bag. I didn’t know what she was doing.

      The last email she sent me that she is going to Bangalore and asked me not to call her to disturb her. After like almost 1 year and 3 moths, someone from her family who is retired police officer calls my dad and says,” jo hua so hua jaane do” aur baith ke baat kartey hain. warna 498a ka case daalegi toh bahut problem hogi aapko aur aapke ladke ko. I think they have realised that what she and her parents have done was a big mistake. Initially they thought my parents will go behind her and try to get her back. But I and my parents didn’t do. So now she is trying to put pressure from Retired Police officer.

      She is falsely trying to use 498a against me and my family.

      Please suggest me what to do?

      My parents have told me not to worry, because they have decided to go JAIL, because they said Truth will prevail. Humne y aisa kuch nahi kiya hai to humey saja mile. But i am worried about them, as they are senior citizens and i don’t know how police will treat them.

    • #3623

      She already gave hint of 498A, and she knows about it.

      dont take her back, if you take her back she always threaten , Blackmail and dominate you with the word 498A.

      its better to go to jail for few days, than

      zindgi bar gulami karna.

      we are with you; FIGHT BACK.

    • #3624

      Thank you for your suggestion Dear D’Souza. My dad received the call again from that retired police officer, and Retd. Poilce officert : So what have you thought?

      Father : what is the intension of the family and what are they upto?

      Officer : That they are asking for expenses, in other words compensation. and it will be good that the things are sorted outside the court.

      Father: That’s fine and i will get some advice from lawyer.

      And not there is no calls from few days, may be they are planning some thing else or may be i think that family must be thinking, that they have already taken gold from our house, so if they will go to court the case might go against them and the girl wont be able to remarry if the case is in the court till the vedict is out. She is in hurry and wants to go, thats why she wants to settle out of court and extort as much money she can by threating me via retd police officer.

      But my parents have already decided to go to jail.

      Lets see what happens.

      Thank you once again for your reply and suppoort from your side.



    • #3625

      try to voice record whenever they call, that may usefull, if they threaten bla bla.

      be prepared for worse. Girl side never go easy, they try to swindle as much money as possible.

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