Reply To: Help required

Mr.Arungupta,

See it is your own decision to give your wife divorce or not, but if u ask me as i have got divorce and it is my wife has initiated inspite of their was not my much fault, so what i suggest personally from myside that, you must go with some mediater with a mobile which is having video and audio tapping system and you must keep it on while you start to talk with them and it should not be open to show them they you are doing video tapping, just keep it secret, and request you wife or ask your wife that what she wants she wants to stay with you or she wants to appart from you, as if she wishes to stay with you then you need to put some clauses which u like as restrictions against her for not to go for any type of mischeif like sucide or verbal or physical fights and you both can try to reconcile the marriage and carryon further if u wish to go for it then, if u dont as according to me u must find out what ur wife wishes first,i understand u dont want to continue marriage but think a second chance with it, that if u recover the marriage if possible then u should try that aspect atleast once more time if it is in your and her and both family members favour, but if u strongly beleive it is not possible inspite of the sucide case which ur wife has did, then also i am saying,so it is not a matter of divorce the word but it is a matter of a marriage which is coming to an end. so i feel u should try out for recovering with your wife, if a settlement happens among you and her and you both unitedly ready to stay peacefully and loveably then u should start that and if your wife says that no she also wants divorce then u must ask her that is she is ready to go for divorce on mutual understanding and meetings or she wish to go in to court. If she doesnt reply or doesnt give u any hints for that or if she straight away says you yes she wish to go to court for settlement of divorce as she may ask for her clothes,jewelleries and stridhan then u must understand that she is thinking for going to court as if she is asking for such things and u might have not given or u are not interested to give her back such things then court will be the last option for her and u have to pay those things thru court, so if such things is going to happen between u two then u must immegiately understand that u must file a police as where u are sure that she is going to go to court, if that confirmation u get then first u file a police case with your residence area about her sucide case problem and her discharge with good health certificate and also give the proof of your innocence (if u r innocent then) and then go for a divorce case file if u wish to hurry then her, and if u will keep cool after doing police case of what she did and also do mention in police case that she has already apparted from your family since 6 months then u will get immune when she will do 498a or b or 498 as at that time u will be having as proof of this poilice case that u have well in advance informed to police about the ill will of your wife to do flase 498 cases and also take proof of near ones and dearones and also your neibours as witness try to take them in to the case as they are staying near your housse so they will help u in police case so ultimately if u r wife will do wrong case on u then this police case will help you to get out without much expesnes to be done if she is having the proof that you and your family has did bad with her and u might have did or your any family members might have did bad and if she is having the proof that yourside is bad then god is the malik for you as if she has the proof then forget your innocence which u show to us (i am just saying) but if u r really innocent then u will definetly get immune from our bad laws if u do first police case in that u must mention with proof that your wife has did of her own sucide attempt and she survived and now since 6 months she is not staying with you and u fear for wrong 498 casses may be leived on you or your family and u must have proof from your neibours who are having good reputation in society as you all have not did any bad with her or her family then u get full support of system as then she will be on wrong side and u will be on right side so police and court judge will also understand u good and her bad so the proceedings when u r lawyer will do then u will get mileage in your case and u may win your case and she may loose, and u get divorce if u wish to get divorce first then but if u wish not to get divorce and your wife is admond to get divorce then u have to give divorce ultimately as no female is kept in her unwanted husband’s house forcefully, is the law unwritten but as practical, so it is like if u dont want to give divroce to her then it will be difficult for them to get it but if u and her both are ready for divorce then it is easy for court to finalise only u must be ready to pay some elle money as per your income and assets structure which your wife knows how much u earn and what u have in assets and how is your family is earning so she can ask for money form your salary as maintenance or ellle money and also if u have your house in your name then a share in that one also. if u have child then u have to pay to him or her but if u dont have then that is an advantage to you. so i think i have clarified your many concepts what u have to do,dont forget one thing if u are innocent then u must have all innocency proof for yourself and your family also and if u are guilty then they must have proof of your guiltiness, if they dont have the proof of your guiltiness then u are free bird but your conceious will bite u so give her divroce on that background butif u r good person and u havenot did any bad to your wife and if she expects divorce from you and if u dont want to give then also u have to give and u must give as i did to my wife where i was 80% innocent and 20% guilty but she was 80% guilty and 20% innocent and i was not ready to appart her with, then also i have loose much money and my 3 years old daughter and my reputation in my big family and also i have lost my wife thru divorce so she is living well in her parents house with my daughter and i feel really bad for the situation but then also i am happy that she is happy, so if u feel that you should not leave your wife then u must work on that side and if u feel that she is really bad inspite of such incedent happend then also i am asking u is becausse sometimes after we feel that what we have did is wrong then u must think on that aspect also and u must rethink twice before saying that i am interested to give her divroce first, as it may happen that if u try to check then she might be more unhappy with you so she only says i want divroce then u need not go to put golden net in to water, and u must accept her verdict with whatever reasonable u have to pay as per your situation in financial terms with true and fair and accomodative way to settle your divorce problem out of court settlement if possible but if it is a compulsion from both side or from her side to go in court and do settlement then also u must try to resolve and reconcile out of court as if u go in court then it is definate u have to pay much and more to court peoples and to her so better try to reconcile personally with some good unbaised mediator.. that’s it. kandarp…