> My bhabhi’s father is a retired government officer who was also a union leader. He used to just Sleep in AC office and take the salary home and follows blindly his wife
Your bhabhi wants your brother to be exactly like her father where she can rule the marriage. This also means that she might want to live away from a joint family system. Given an opportunity and the Present legal system, she will not hesitate to go to any extent. There is one of the solutions possibility.
1. Let your brother give her the way and be exactly like his father-in-law who does exactly what his wife says. If this also means to get away from your parents. this can mean lot of changes in the way he thinks and do.
2. OR follow his mind and do what is good for himself and his family (that includes his wife and kid too). This can be a long battle. But at least if he is prepared, there can be a damage control.
This is the classic case with high probability of a 498a and DV case. Trust me, if you don’t act now, you will definitely feel sorry on the long run. what I would suggest you is:
1. Gather all evidence’s (even if this means recording her conversation and her mother’s too). also gather evidences related to her anger, child abuse (see if you can record), doctors analysis of why she was not able to conceive, picking up issues and frequently running away to her mom’s place (this is explained in detail). This is VERY IMPORTANT part. this helps to save your brother, parents and your self.
2. Once you have gathered enough evidences, file a case (use a good lawyer) in your nearest police station with all details that you described here. once you have done this, just get anticipatory bail (AB) to all people living in your home (including the kids). Remember always that a lawyer will say AB is not required. but insist him in doing it. if he is not capable, then just change the lawyer. The AB will not cost you much but will give you lot of peace.
3. Once you have AB, use Restitution of congeal rights (RCR) to get her back legally. Use RCR every time she decides to run away. Trust me, using this she will either come to your home with a fit of anger or file 498a with DV. What ever it is, you are not effected. If she comes, start recording all events (if you don’t have a recorder, go buy one. this will ensure your safety in long run).
4. Ask your brother to empty his bank account and FD’s. Always remember, more assets means more trouble. Talk to a lawyer on the parameters governing spouse support.
5. Prepare your brother for a long battle and this will not be easy for him without yours and your parents support. Please stick together in tough time and don’t let internal information to leak to your bhabhi. As the time goes by, you will get to see lot of dramas by her calling any of the family members for information.
Do let us know where you live. Do join yahoo groups and Google around to educate yourself on 498a. Remember, Information is Power. Let us know if you have any questions and keep updating.